Mind Map of the Basement Floor of

Louie Gohmert's Brain

Push the Uranium One conspiracy theory hard enough

and you become so radioactive you glow in the dark.

Fruit Salad Chef in Trump Junta Calls for Special Counsel to 

Investigate a Russian Company That Bought a Canadian 

Firm That Owned 20% of U.S. Uranium

Just moments after Ali Larijani, Iran's chief

nuclear negotiator, swore that his country

had no intention of enriching uranium for the

purpose of building nuclear weapons, a power

failure left the room in which he was speaking

pitch black--except for Larijani, who glowed in

the dark like a floorshow at a firefly convention.

"Is it true that you Iranians are enriching

uranium for the purpose of removing

ring-around-the-collar?"