Reigning NBA MVP Kobe Bryant will not have surgery on his

right pinkie, because it would keep him from casting magic

spells for too long.

Kobe had decided that would be the last time he drank any

of that XTreme Persimmon Gatorade.

Kobe Bryant takes a quick hit on his sugar tit.

"Sarko, you're no giant! I'm only 5' 6" and

I'm as tall as you. What will I tell my little

Françoise? She believes France is led by

a man a head taller than Kobe Bryant!"

"Nuh, uh, uh! Possession is 9/10ths of the law, homeboy!"

In a reversal of fortune, Kobe Bryant gets slam dunked.