Jeff Bezos is less an astronaut and more of a

starry-eyed shitkicker.

Tear Gas Truthers Claim Gas Attack on Astronaut 

Standing on Moon Was Staged

Trump Rejects Jesus for His Space Force, 

Says His Hair Is So Long You Can't Tell If 

He's a Man or a Woman

"Honey, there's an astronaut at the front door who's asking 

if you're interested in candid photography?"

"If it's Eric Greitens, the Governor of Missouri,

tell him we don't have a camera."

Eric 'Borg Eye' Greitens Remains Defiant

Amid Criminal Charges

I Come in Peace for All Catkind

"Uh-oh, it looks like HAL may be a lip reader."

Before NASA Invented the Maximum Absorbency

Garment System for Astronauts

Sign of the Times #44

The Arizona Senator reminded people of

the fossils of Ancient Astronauts found

at the bottom of the Grand Canyon.

We Come in Peace for All Mankind

Why Neil Armstrong Didn't Walk Far

on the Moon

Astronauts Tinkering with Water-to-Wine Machine

Asked whether he's always been covered by government

health insurance, John McCain replied, "I've never been

an astronaut but I know the challenges of space." And

then he lifted off.

Don't listen to what the astronauts say.

Life without gravity is pretty darn scary.

We used to wonder why astronauts wore funny

hats before blasting off into space. Now we don't.

NASA spokesperson Shana Dale seemed to bite her

tongue after she was forced to admit astronauts aren't

superhuman beings from outer space.

Before Astronaut Lisa Nowak Went Into Orbit

After