Having already hiked the Appalachian Trail (wink wink nudge

 nudge!), Mark Sanford will now hike the Pacific Crest Trail 

(i. e., run against Trump in the Republican primaries).

Man Trips While Hiking, 

Makes Big Find in the Process

Mark Sanford Announces His Days of Hiking the

Appalachian Trail Are Over; "Maybe It's My Age," He 

Says Sadly, "But I'm Too Tired to Take Another Step"

Out for a drive through the Deep South?

If so, watch for 'Appalachian Hikers' as

you pass through South Carolina, the

Family Values State.

Rescued Hiker Hallucinated Monty Python Attack

Climbers who had ascended the North Face were 

reluctant to admit they had also descended the 

South Butt.

BackTapper Backpack:  for the Drinker

with a Serious Hiking Problem

"In the U.K., you can walk for a day and you'll end up in a pub.
In Australia, you can walk for twelve days and end up looking
like a total idiot."

What really ended the affair between Governor
Sanford and his Argentine mistress was when
she said she was tired of carrying all the camping
gear for their hikes on the Appalachian Trail.

As this backpacker will tell you, it would probably be a
good idea to avoid hiking in Afghanistan this summer.

What's all the hubbub about 'Going Gorp'?

Hikers have been doing that for years.

Just the day before, the unlucky backpacker had been told

the chances of a meteorite hitting him in the nose while he

slept were 1 in 182 trillion.

"I'm made to look ridiculous just so some candyass

hiker can wear a pair of Dahlgren Dri-Stride Socks?

Sheesh, we alpacas get no respect!"

When you return from your hiking trip into the mountains

of Lebanon, don't forget to close the gate.