You can tell the age of a Juggalo by how much of his or her

skin surface remains tattoo-free.

Rick Scott So White He's Indistinguishable 

from Your Typical Limestone Column

Skin Game

If you think of him as a skin disease, Joe Manchin is

less loathsome.

Fake smiles cause Crow's Feet.  In Kyrsten Sinema's 

case, it's Buzzard's Feet.

"Who purloined my Clearasil?"

The most important 'security measure' is

making sure your skin is the right color.

Profile in Necrosis

Trump looks bleached out.  Is this a side effect

from his Clorox injections?

Trump Re-Brands Just in Time

for Presidential Campaign

Remember Mon Cul, the red-assed baboon, the only creature on 

Earth who knew an English word that rhymes with 'orange'?

Pigmentometer Reveals Curious Non-Trump

Skin Albedo

Lisa Alexander has egg on LaFace.

Kayleigh McEnanny is just 32, but judging by her face and

 hair, she's an old 32.

Have you noticed that Mike Pence's skin is beginning to

look as orange as Trump's?

Remember Tangerine Dream, "one of the most influential 

electronic groups of all time?"  Well, this isn't that band,

but the skin tone is tangerinesque.

Is it a coincidence that coronavirus cases 

indicated on this map are the same color

as Trump's skin?

Maybe not, but Trump does look oranger than usual.

"Oh bliss! Bliss and heaven! Oh, it was gorgeousness and 

gorgeousity made flesh!"

Not Just for Wood Surfaces Anymore