When the recent survivor of a 'zipper job' was asked 

if he wished to watch 'Survivor White House', he said, 

"Please don't make me laugh, or I may split a seam!"

Surgical Air Strike

Surgical Heart Strike

Man Who Died from Heart Attack Had Genetic 

Predisposition to Eat Triple Bypass Burgers

Heart Writing Book about Its Cheney Problems

Speaking of President Obama, Dick Cheney said yesterday, 

"He has been an unmitigated disaster to the country."

Unfortunately, the Obama disaster hasn't been bad enough

 to keep Dick from getting a heart transplant. 

Dick Cheney Gets First Heart, 

Newt Gingrich Gets National Memorial

Donor Identified for Dick Cheney's

Heart Transplant

Frank Luntz Sez:  "Fellow Republicans, don't say 'Capitalism'. 

Say 'Coronary Bypass'."

Halliburton dropped $250 million to keep

him out of a Nigerian prison.  Will it now

cough up another $787,000 to plant a new

heart in Dick Cheny's chest?

In the not-too-distant future, if you wish to express your
approval of something, you may be able to say, "I
'Heartmate  II Ventricular Assist Device' it."

When the recent survivor of a 'zipper job' heard that

John McCain wanted to suspend the presidential race

and return to Washington to work on the government

bailout, he said, "Please don't make me laugh, or I may

split a seam!"

If our ancestors had had the good sense to build the Lou Dobbs

Wall in 1900, it would have prevented Michel Dabaghi, the son

of Lebanese parents, from being born in the United States

and growing up to take the job of medical pioneer away

from Americans.

"Want a side order of Lipitor with your Triple-Bypass Burger?"

"With my approval rating at 18%

and his at 36%, I asked the President,

'What's your secret?'

We both laughed so hard I almost

had to get a new zipper job."

"Mr. Willey, is that a tie you're wearing, or did the 
heart surgeon forget to sew you up?"