The Fox News Zeitgeist: a Vacuum Inside a Vacuum

Claudius Ptolemy Sez:  "Your cosmology is

 not worth a fig, Newton!"

A Day in the Life of the Oval Office

New Study Has Scientists Wondering Why Trump Exists; 

Complete Symmetry Between His Matter and Anti-Matter 

Means He Logically Couldn't Exist

Just because you're a Flat Earther doesn't mean

you can't get excited about tomorrow's solar eclipse.

In Trump's cosmology, Barack Obama is the 

First Cause, the Unmoved Mover, the Demiurge. If 

something happens, Obama, like the butler, did it.

Miss Alternate Universe

Neo-Trumpian Cosmologist Says Entire Universe Is Rigged

The Obama Corollary to the 

Cosmological Argument

There must be a First Cause, an Unmoved Mover, 

responsible for all the bad things that happen in

the world.  And that's Barack Hussein Obama.

Not since St. Thomas Aquinas formulated his version of the 

Cosmological Argument for the existence of God has so 

much been attributed to a First Cause like Barack Obama.

Scientists eventually discovered what came before the 

Big Bang:  it was the Pantomime Zebra.

Barack Caguama and

 the Problem of Infinite

Regress:  It's Turtles

All the Way Down

Breaking News Mashups #8

'Majority of Americans Doubt the Big Bang, 

Believe Short Sex Is Pretty Normal'

"Were I to summarize, students, what I've put up on the board,

I would simply say, 'Why?'."

Orgonite is a mineral formed when history is suddenly

thrown into reverse and is small enough to fit into

Grover Norquist's hand.  If Mitt Romney is elected 

President of the United States in 2012, Orgonite 

production will experience unprecedented growth,

according to what all the experts are now saying.

He had pretty much given up on formulating a Unified 

Field Theory, but he was still working on a Conspiracy 

Theory of Conspiracy Theories.

"Whoa! I didn't realize the end of the world was this close."

George Smoot, co-winner of the 2006 Nobel Prize

in Physics, uses pantomime to explain the

masturbatory aspect of the Big Bang Theory

of the Universe.

Senior Citizens Keith Richards and Ron Wood

Performing at 'Bigger Bang Theory of the Universe' Benefit

"Oh, the bang on my wedding night with

Anna Nicole was much bigger than the one

I remember when the universe was created."