Warm Scuzzies #798

Ed Ahlersmeyer

Former Secretary of State Believes Trump Hasn't 

Reached 'Peak Moron' Yet

Profile in Miasma

"What does Trump believe in?" is the wrong question. 

"What does Trump believe in on April 18, 2018, at 11:46

 AM EDT, when the temperature is 50° F and the humidity

 is 41%?" is the right question.

"Mark Zuckerberg is such a cardboard cutout."

"Don't you mean 'cut up'?"

"No, cutout."

"We were good fellas. Wiseguys."

"Honey, there's an astronaut at the front door who's asking 

if you're interested in candid photography?"

"If it's Eric Greitens, the Governor of Missouri,

tell him we don't have a camera."

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #173

Ma & Pa Kettle Go to the Morgue

Studies show the $1 difference between 

$19,999 and $20,000 has a considerable 

effect on sales with items whose prices end

 with 99 far outselling those ending with 00.

Trump With Lawyers vs. Trump Without Lawyers

Adventures in Aestheticism #15

Megan McArdle had hoped to become a writer for the 

National Enquirer, but the bias against conservatives 

forced her to become an op-ed columnist for 

The Washington Post instead.

The 'instant rush of utter unfairness' still lingered 

six years after Richard Cohen learned he was only 

the 8th Runner-Up for 'Wanker of the Decade'.

Oh Bury Me Not Under Old Cliches #5

China Introduces the TrumpBus; New Widetrack,

High-Clearance Design Ideal for Autocrats Who

Need More Room for Throwing Flunkies Under

the Bus

Stinky Zinke believes his Bachelor of Science degree in 

geology makes him a geologist. If that's true, then a Bachelor 

of Arts degree in the humanities must make you a humanist.

Rebellious Youth Says He Doesn't Believe in 

Pablo Picasso

Don Blankenship, the Dark Lord of Coal Country, Vows

to Boldly Lead West Virginia into the Nineteenth Century

Pakistani Team Favored in Upcoming

Synchronized Silly Walks Competition

Oxymorons for Our Time #191

Hannity's Ethics

To every thing there is a season.

A time to laugh, and a time to mourn.