Mark Zuckerberg Welcomes the Month of Caesar Augustus

2020: a Look Back

Order now and we'll throw in Absolutely Free a

Betsy DeVos Funniest Dick Pics Calendar for 2021!

Fake News Network to Provide Fake Coverage of 

Fake Inauguration of Fake President on Fakeuary 20

Attention Trumpniks!  When are you going to order your 

Trump-Putin Nonaggression Pact 2017 Calendar? Must

speak Russian to order.

Pretty in Mink

The End Times have lasted since Jesus ascended into Heaven 

and promised to return to Earth ándale pronto.  That's over 

2,000 years.  So, instead of using AD or CE to denote our

era, why not ET?

April Is the Cruelest Month

Only Marco Rubio would be fourteen years late in 

recognizing the century which began on January 1,

2001.

 According to Fearguth's Zippy the Pinhead calendar, 

January is Zen Bowling Month. Fearguth likes Zen 

Bowling because no ball, pins, or lane are required. 

In fact, nothing is required except meditating 

on the idea that nothing is required, thereby

 becoming aware of the Stream of Zippyness.

Did you know that 2014 is the Year of the Cat in the

Tinfoil Hat?

Yes, it's Year One, A.B., and he's

still there.

When Great Britain (including its colonies in North America) 

finally adopted the Gregorian Calendar in 1752, it was 

necessary to correct the old Julian Calendar by 11 days.  

As a result, Wednesday, 2 September 1752 was 

followed by Thursday, 14 September 1752. Rioting 

ensued, with people demanding, "Give us our eleven 

days back!"  In contrast, those who are inclined to vote 

for Mitt Romney today aren't rioting and demanding, 

"Give us our eight years with George W. Bush back!"  

Why is this?

Two very important things happened today:  1) it was the 

first annual Chick-fil-A® Appreciation Day; 2)  according 

to Representative Mike Kelly (R-PA), “Today is the day 

religious freedom died in America.”

Remember him?  Well, he apparently decided to give

 Mohandas Gandhi a second look.

"Since it's Leap Day, let's jump right over that small patch 

of brown liquid, otherwise known as Santorum, shall we?"

Every night, just before he laid himself down to sleep, Newt

would read Sweet Land of Liberty to his inner child.

"If you don't ask, I won't tell!"

It's the Year of the Wiwwy Warge Wascal Wabbit.

Does anybody know why Carly Fiorina, Linda McMahon, and

Meg Whitman didn't make the cut for the

2011 Great American Conservative Women Calendar?  Bay

Buchanan made it, even though she'll turn 63 this year.  And

so did Michelle Duggar, mother of 19, and Clare Booth Luce, 

dead since 1987.