Lock & Load, Jesus Is Risen!

On Easter Sunday, Elon Musk likes to do his 

Resurrected Jesus impression.

He's Back!

Staying dead for only three days is like giving up Lent 

jokes the day after Lent ends.

Herman Cain Redivivus

The Part of the Easter Story the 

Gun Banners Leave Out

JFC Charged with 'Incitement to Resurrection'

Jesus Takes a Cue from Trump

Godzilla Pulls the Old Switcheroo

Trump Tells Crowd 'Happy Easter', Then 

Criticizes Jesus for Never Thanking Him

 for Raising Him from the Dead

Jesus Appears to His Disciples

Sunday, April 1, 33 AD

Fake News Banished from the Sweet By and By

The First Words Jesus Uttered When He

Arose from the Dead on Easter Morning

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #103

Joe Paterno Has Risen From the Grave

"When I'm gone, my son, Kim Jong-un, is liable to get drunk

and start executing his kinfolks and all their friends.  He 

believes he's Stalin redivīvus, you know."

The Unexpurgated Bible #90

"And they went out and fled from the tomb; for trembling and 

astonishment had come upon them when they saw the red, 

white, and blue elephant that had been resurrected from 

the dead; and they said nothing to anyone, for they were 

afraid."

As had been prophesied, the Republican

 Savior arose from the tomb.

It had taken Jesus only three days to 

arise from the grave.  For Breitbart,

it has taken 69 days---and counting.

Tarzan and Jane couldn't believe their eyes, but, just as

 had been prophesied, Cheetah had arisen from the dead.

 God, apparently, had at least one more sequel in mind.

The Unexpurgated Bible #66

And when he thus had spoken, Jesus cried with a loud voice,

"Asa Candler, come forth!"