"Did you hear Alex Jones has turned on Donald Trump and

 is backing Ron DeSantis for President?"

"No, but I did hear that power tools are not an 

effective treatment for headaches."

I Skipped My Botox Appointment Thanks 

to This Beauty Tool

America's Ultimate Home and Beauty Tool™

For the Mr. Fixit on Your Christmas List

"Down the nut hatch, children!"

As any dog will tell you, learning how to use a knife and fork 

is harder than it looks.

If you give a man a tool, expect him to use it.

Euphemism for Trump's Cabinet

Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #177

Handy Tools

"If he were a tool, Marco Rubio would be a Banana Handle."

"Whaddya mean 'if'?"

Don't Call a Spade a Horticultural Implement

Archaeologists may have found the world's first tools, 

and it appears they are the ancestors of these guys.

Classic Frantz Fanon Work Now

Available in New Translation for

Auto Mechanics

Senator Ernst Claims Right to Open Carry a

Bertschy Emasculator While Delivering the

GOP's Response to President Obama's 

State of the Union Address

"Toobin, not Toolbin!"

Paleolithic Tools (Silicon-Based)

Paleolithic Tools (Carbon-Based)

Peeler

Repealer

Types of Paleolithic Tools Found in Arizona

Tools Used by Homo Erectus

Tools Used by Homo Murdochus