Cane Toad

McCain Toad

Q: What is black and white and red all over?

A: Ann Coulter with a sunburn.

Björk Dressed As Jackson Pollock's Dropcloth

"Jeez, that moustache is such an obvious fake!"

"He ain't heavy, he's my homie."

"The red lights flash first, Mr. President, then the
 white lights.  Why this is so is the subject of intense
 debate among my buddies, but I'm inclined to 
accept it as one of life's little mysteries."

Debbie Schlussel,

the Ugly Ann Coulter

"And as you know, my position is clear --

I'm the Master and Commander Guy."

To tell Ninel Conde was a singer, all you

had to do was see her powerful lungs.

When Liu Cen said she was head over heels in love,

she meant it.

Jelena Jankovic Executing One of the Most Difficult

Moves in Tennis: The Crotch Shot

"When I see," wrote Thomas Sowell, "the worsening

degeneracy in our politicians, our media, our educators,

and our intelligentsia, I can't help wondering if the

day may yet come when the only thing that can save

this country is a military coup." Then, putting down his pen,

he attempted to commit suicide by swallowing a whole bottle

of Pepto-Bismol.

World's Worst Jobs #36

Indian Truck Tire Unloader

Cat Finds Asphalt Shingle Roof Not So Hot

Half-Hearted Russian Nationalist

Your field guide collection won't be complete

until you acquire this title.

There's nothing quite so satisfying as eating a

deep-fried starfish-on-a-stick.

The hat had worked just fine for her until the time came

for spring migration. That's when she understood why

the design was called 'Fly Away Home'.

Wenderson Arruda has learned one of life's most

important lessons: "When uncertain, when in doubt,

run in circles, scream and shout."

It was obvious he had 'Champion' written all over him.

Warning

No Woolgathering Beyond This Point

"I'm made to look ridiculous just so some candyass

hiker can wear a pair of Dahlgren Dri-Stride Socks?

Sheesh, we alpacas get no respect!"

"Wow, Mr. President, I see that your right testicle has finally descended."

"Did you know, Pete, that I have a pair of cammie

jammies just like yours?"

President Bush is quite fond of Mother Pucker's

Wild Persimmon Pudding.

Mr. and Mrs. Bones Lead Revival of Christy Minstrels

"I'll be darned, Mr. President, your ass really is in a sling!"

Russian Hockey Team Gazing at the Navel of the Universe

World's Worst Jobs #35

Chinese Sand Sled Carrier

The bull had long harbored a seething hatred of

all members of the Mickey Mouse Club.

Scott Verplank Giving God a Piece of His Mind

In a reversal of fortune, Kobe Bryant gets slam dunked.

"Hmmmm," the President mused, "maybe I should garotte

this sumbitch while I have the chance."

Rapunzel Lets Down Her Hair

Big Babies Coaching Little Babies in Baby Crying Contest

World's Worst Jobs #34

Chinese Usable Coal Scavenger

"Why is North America where it is?

That's a good question. According to

the latest research, it's because North

America is on top of South America."

Presidential Lectern on Autopilot

If you own a cow, the least you can do is to wash it,

as this guy is doing. If you don't own a cow, that's the

least you can do.

President Bush prays often, but his prayers never

rise more than fifty feet into the atmosphere,

where they hit the 'You Gotta Be Shitting Me' barrier.

This is a Serbian Mind-Sweeper at work.

Will he find yours?

Some say circumcision is to blame for many social

and psychological problems in adult males.

All that young boys undergoing the procedure say is

"YYYYYYOOOOOOWWWWWW!"

Sri Lankans Making Obeisance to Jiminy Cricket

If you've never seen the Dark Side of the Force,

take a look at this.

There's more love expressed in this photograph of Elizabeth

and John Edwards than can be found in all of the movies

ever made in Hollywood.

Without warning, Hillary Clinton was struck by the polysemy

of the Stars and Stripes. Her reaction was to open her mouth

long enough to utter a provocative platitude, as was her want.

Pelusa the Dog had convinced Estefani and Leslie

he was the Big Wheel of Planet Barrow and should

be treated accordingly.

Here we see Palestinians being blasted by an Israeli water

cannon. If the Palestinians are the hosed, aren't the Israelis

the hosers?

It hath been said that Fearguth is all wet. The Incident

at Stone Creek Waterfall may help to explain why.