Mock not Tailgunner Ted's use of his daughters as

human shills, lest ye be Cruzified.

Sultan of Brunei Throws Monkey Grinch into Christmas

Adam Shafi hated gay marriage so much he tried to

join an Al-Qaida affiliate.  Now in custody, he will soon

learn that in prison, like Heaven, there is no marriage

nor giving in marriage.

Satan Benches Oklahoma Man for Being Obvious

Man Opens Fireplace, Finds Century-Old Santa

What Senator Cruz Is Pointing Out Today #29

An Isis Beamer

The favorite Yiddish word used BY Trump is 'schlong'.  

The favorite Yiddish word used FOR Trump is 'schmuck'.

Donald Trump's New Campaign Biography

Hits the Shelves in Time for Christmas

Allegories for Our Time #36

Trump and Cruz Contend for the Soul of the GOP

It's so warm this Christmas season, Santa will be 

wearing a Speedo.

"Donald Trump reminds me of the old joke about the 

Farting Carver, but I can see that you've already

heard it."

Jesus of Vienna Nativity Scene (with Bacon)

"Rictus Erectus said WHAT?"

"Don't say that word!"

"What word?"

"I can't tell you or I'll get schlonged."

"Like Hillary in 2008?"

"No, like Gore in 2000."

The Donald Hits the Trumpnik Sweet Spot

Stunt Double for Donald Trump's Hair Runs Away

from Presidential Campaign

“Wisconsin does not have a death penalty

 law, but with significant practice and careful 

aim, law-abiding citizens can help clean our 

society of these scumbags.”

Until he said what he did about Hillary Clinton going

to the bathroom, Americans didn't know that Donald

Trump suffers from Urophobia (the fear of urine

and urination).

Harold Bornstein, Donald Trump's Doctor, Sez:

 "If elected, Mr. Trump, I can state unequivocally, 

will be the first individual ever elected to the 

presidency who never urinates."

"Please don't confuse me with Donald Trump."

Elon Musk is proof that not ALL billionaires are 

cretins like Donald Trump.

When Senator Rubio didn't show up in Heaven, he 

explained that not showing up was a vote against it.

Disgusting!

"Just curious, Mr. Rogers, but why do people never say, 

'The Gorilla in the Room'?"

Donald Trump's Got Milk

"It takes two hands to handle my whoppers!"

"You always make it a special day for me. 

You know how, don't you? By just your 

being you."

If you're close enough to count the 

pores in Ted Cruz's nose, you're

too damn close.

Herman Cain and Ben Carson are rumored to own

this shirt.

Rumored to Be The Munsters Favorite Movie

Strong Bad Sez:  "Okay, so until next time, who put the 

wee in weenie? I don't know. Probably Trump, that 

freakin' weirdo!"

Schlongman Sez:  "I'll follow Donald Trump 

to the end of the world."

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #126

Pardon My Schlong

Big Bigots, Little Bigots #75

Bruce Hagen

Now we know why Donald Trump's skin looks orange:  

unlike Hillary Clinton, he never pees!

Donald Trump Annihilates the Competition,

Wins 'Lie of the Year' Award for 2015

Rudolph Caught Slacking

"Whose turn is it to take out the trash?"

Senator Graham Announces the End of His Presidential

 Campaign Before Millions Noticed He Had Been Running

William Celli, Would-Be Anti-Muslim Bomber, Sez: 

"I'll follow Donald Trump to the end of the world."

"Tell me when the target looks like Beaky Buzzard."

Have you seen Donald Trump in his new favorite shirt?

If Vladimir Putin were to attack Turkey from the rear, 

would Greece help?

Sepp Blatter Says FIFA Ban 'Only a Flesh Wound'

Sepp Blatter Banned by FIFA, Says, "I'll Be Back!", 

Is Immediately Sued by the Terminator for Copyright 

Infringement

"My disciples just call me 'Scratch'."

“President Obama wants to change the way America looks. 

A lot of it has to do with skin pigmentation. Everybody

knows that green is the Judeo-Christian color that made 

America the greatest nation in world history."

It was when he started puking rainbows that Americans

 began to suspect Donald Trump might only be an

imaginary beast.

"I would like to apologize to Secretary Clinton for 

photoshopping this picture to make it look like I'm 

standing behind the lectern I built as a Cub Scout."

Martin Shkreli Calls Accusation of 'Being Human' Baseless