Those who are fans of Bain Capital were asked to raise

 their hands.  Only one hand went up:  Michele Davis's.

Newt Gingrich Calls Obama the 'Anti-Clinton', Apparently 

Forgetting He Himself Was the Original 'Anti-Clinton'

As you can see, Misty Cook is supremely 

white.

Missouri Voters OK 'Right to Pray While Armed' Amendment

Mitt Romney Praying for the Sheiks of the Burning Sand

Mass shootings had become so commonplace in the United

 States that all flags were permanently flown at half-staff.

ZEGS* Maniac

*Zombie-Eyed Granny Starver

With luck, this student in one of Professor Glenn Reynold's 

law classes at the University of Tennessee is confident 

he can repel any armed intruder who might show up

unannounced.

"What did you do in the culture war, Daddy?"

"I ate a chicken sandwich."

Yes, John Schnatter, CEO of Papa John's, the price of pizza

may go up when your employees have health insurance.

But we sure won't be buying pizza at your joint.

World's Worst Yoobs #120

Alisyn Camerota

In the best of all possible worlds, both Ben Quayle and 

David Schweikert would lose in the Republican primary

for representative of the 6th Congressional District.  But,

in the world we live in, the fact that one will lose is 

more than good enough.

Which country should the U.S. invade when it

is attacked by a domestic terrorist, like

Wade Michael Page?

Rich people need their outlaw heroes, too.

In terms of grammar, Mitt Romney only exists in the passive

voice.  For example, this is not a picture of Mitt Romney 

eating a hamburger.  No, this is a picture of a hamburger

 shoving itself into Mitt Romney's mouth.

Pam 'The Huntress' Geller Bags Erick 'The Hunted' Erickson

What Constipation Looks Like When

It Gets 'Politicized'

Despite the fact the Trojan Elephant had raised $106 million

 in June and $101 million in July, the citizens of Troy were still 

keeping the gate of the city closed.  Their recent encounter

with the Trojan Rabbit was still fresh on their minds and

they were taking no chances.

Don't you just love it when Elton John gets into a catfight with 

Madonna over Lady Gaga?  So much for Ars Gratia Artis!

It's all Ars Gratis Pecunia these days.

"Despite appearances, I'm not dead yet!"

When he heard the explosion, Mr. Creosote's dog knew

he had lost his best friend.

Girls must be getting older these days.  Ann

Coulter is now 50.  Back in the olden days,

an unmarried woman at 50 wasn't called

'Supergirl'; she was called an 'Old Maid.'

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #405

Dr. Marisha Agana

"Now I get it:  Man of Steel and Steelman!

Ha! Ha! Ha!  Sarah, you're funnier than

a rubber crutch!"

"Bascart, bascart, bascart!  Gotta remember that the next

time I talk to the little people and explain how I learned to 

operate a bascart on my own, without ever having to use

food stamps."

McCain, Lieberman, and Graham Urge Attack on Syria

Before U.S. Runs Out of Middle-Eastern Countries It

Hasn't Invaded Yet

Jim DeMintia:  Worse Than Alzheimer's Because It

Makes You Think You're Living in South Carolina

Islamophobes Gonna Hate, Mosques Gonna Burn

Haters Gonna Hate, People Gonna Die

Pete Sessions Remarries, Stars in New Reality TV Show, 

My Five Sons

"Jan, honey, wanna see my car elevator?"

How easy it would be for Mitt Romney to quash Harry Reid's 

claim:  all Mitt would have to do is release his tax returns.

  But Mitt obviously has much more to lose than he would

 gain were he show his papers.

Need a job?  Octomom could use an auctioneer.

The first picture from Mars was a rather tragic one:  

Curiosity had killed the cat.

Given the opportunity, Pastor Todd Bentley will

'Kick You in the Teeth for Christ'.

What Happened to the Last Guy Who Called

Harry Reid a 'Dirty Liar'

"Taking care of business, every day

Taking care of business, every way

I've been taking care of business, it's all mine

Taking care of business. and working overtime."

Would you buy a used gar from this man?

It finally came to pass that people stopped praying for an 

end to gun violence for fear that a gunman would start 

shooting them while their heads were bowed.

Need a laugh?  Visit RedState.com for all your humor needs!

"If I understand you correctly, Mr. Priebus, you're a 

'clean liar', not a 'dirty liar', like Harry Reid."

Mitt Romney's visit to Basalt, Colorado, was the most exciting 

thing to happen in the area since the lava cooled sometime 

during the Late Tertiary Period, ten million years ago. 

Would Chris Christie 'balance' the Republican ticket?

No way, José!

"Jan, honey, you're lookin' mighty good, and I'm sober

as a Mormon judge!"

As the Pussy Riot trial amply illustrates, when it comes to

government, the Russians prefer to live under a Czar, a

Stalin, or a 'Velvet Authoritarian', like Vladimir Putin.

Three Republican Amigos--Frank Guinta, Dan Benishek,

and Bill Johnson--Running for a Second Term in the 

House of Representatives as 'Anti-Incumbent Incumbents'

"Monsignor, what exactly do you mean when you say,

'We are domed'?"

By the end of his campaign for the presidency, the only

things related to himself Mitt Romney was willing to

talk about were his shoes and to what lengths he would

go to keep them polished.

Mitt Romney Sez:  Sister Moonbeam of the Larger Lunacy's 

Muslim Brotherhood Claims Are 'Not Part Of My Campaign'

Great-Grandpa Rowdy Yates Endorses Mitt Romney

for President