Paul Ryan wants you to know he is not poor because (1) he  

was not born lazy, (2) he does not have a culture problem, 

and (3) he is  not from the inner city.  Paul Ryan does not 

want you to know he is not poor because he has a college 

education paid for with Social Security survivors benefits.

"Mein Herr, Ben Carson says America is 'very much like

Nazi Germany'."

"Jawohl, Il Duce, he's such a dummkopf!"

While it may or may not be true that Abraham Lincoln 

would refuse to appear on Between Two Ferns, there

is no doubt that Honest Abe would never have shaken

hands with Adam Savader.

Smiler Grogan

Smiler McConnell

At luxury gun ranges, shooters can now take aim at

live targets.

Bedbugs Take the Next Step in Hospitality 

Industry Advertising

The Emperor's New Clothes

"Uh, you know what, Zach? I have to say, when I heard that, 

like people are still watching Fernwood 2 Night, I was actually 

pretty surprised."

Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #149

Did the CIA spy on the Senate Intelligence Committee? 

Did the Senate Intelligence Committee spy on the CIA? 

Or did the NSA spy on them both as they were spying on 

each other?

Scientists are now saying that the sponge is the ancestor 

of all animals. That would explain a lot, wouldn't it?

Steve Stockman Sez:  "Hey, this bathtub

gin ain't half bad!"

[CPAC drove him to drink.]

When he turned 72 on March 14, 1951, Albert 

Einstein celebrated Fearguth's 72nd birthday 

on March 10, 2014. This was made possible 

by what Kurt Vonnegut in 1959 called a

'Chrono-Synclastic Infundibulum'.

“You see our movement at its core is an intellectual 

movement.  We are based on the greatest ideas ever 

conceived in the mind of man." 

As George Orwell might have said, "At 50, Sarah Palin has 

the face she deserves."

Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #148

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #94

David Got His Gun

Vladimir Putin Riding Bear Back En Route to Wrestling

Match with Mama Grizzly Sarah Palin

"I never drink . . . wine."

Court Says 'Upsuit' Photos at CPAC Are Legal

Rand Paul Wins CPAC Straw Pole

for Second Year in a Row

"Honey, you won't believe what I just found in

this box of Froot Loops!"

Remember 'Slow Hop' by Froghat?

How many more Mike Maggios are out there, sitting on

 benches in black robes, viewing defendants and plaintiffs 

through the lenses of racism, homophobia, misogyny, and 

the conservative political philosophy they hold dear?

Warm Scuzzies #452

Judge Mike Maggio

Warm Scuzzies #451

Lt. Gov. Jay Dardenne

Obama Gets No R-S-P-E-C-T

Fossilized Remains of a Man and His Pet Dinosaur

That Didn't Make It to Noah's Ark on Time

Flag Desecration #73

Wisconsin Congressman Entertains CPAC

with Audiobook Performance

The Legendary White Beast of BenghazAaaaarrrrrrggghhh!

As Kermit the Frog might say, "It's not easy being

green, especially on really cold mornings."

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #550

Randy Brogdon

SAME OLD LOOK, SAME OLD TASTE!

Sarah Palin obviously likes her Cuba Libre supersized.

John Cornyn Crushes Teabagger Steve Stockman; 

90-Year-Old Ralph Hall Forced into Walkoff

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #549

Kesha Rogers

They don't matriculate students at Princeton 

University the way they used to.

Contrary to popular belief, the 'P' in George P. Bush does

not stand for 'Psychopath'.

World's Worst Yobs #298

Paul Taylor

"I believe in miracles

Where're you from, you sexy thing, you sexy thang you

I believe in miracles since you came along, you sexy thing

Where did you come from?"

"Hey, your cat sure is fat!  What's its name?"

"Tuesday."

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History repeats itself:  first as tragedy,

second as farce.

South Carolina Warlord Says President Obama Is So 

'Weak and Indecisive' That It Makes His 'Eyes Roll

and His Wrists Limp'

John Kerry was FOR an 'incredible act of aggression' on a 

'trumped-up pretext' before he was AGAINST it':  first in the 

case of Vietnam, second in the case of Iraq.  Is he now 

trying, in the case of the Crimea, to trick Vladimir Putin 

into following his example?

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #548

Jim Garrow

Would dropping Marco Rubio on Vladimir Putin's head be an 

instance of Reasonless Animality or Mindless Vegetability?